Over the summer, I decided I was going to leave New York by the time my current lease ended (which is in two days!). After about eight months of living in the city, I just felt worn down from the things that make this place what it is, from the suffocating subway stations to the stench of garbage, which is undeniably worse than what you imagine when you think of hot garbage.
I’m really, really glad I stuck it out though (a visit back home in July for a friend’s wedding certainly helped). I can say that even as I don’t have a job, even as I spent the last month on an emotional roller coaster as the result of the shutdown of Mic, the digital news website I was working for.
Since that day from hell exactly a month ago, there have been moments of confusion, anger, sadness — all of the feelings. It was a bit of a traumatic experience! But now I’m almost nervously excited with the anticipation of what’s ahead. It came at the expense of 113 people losing their jobs, but I’ve been given the opportunity to start something new. In my case, what’s old is new again, and I’m re-entering the freelancing world with a lot of optimism rather than the endless questions I had the first time around a few years ago.
So as I reflect on the last year, transition describes it best. And not just for myself but also for a lot of the people in my life. Friends have gotten married, welcomed children, moved, started new jobs and projects and generally left people or the things that were no longer serving them.
One of my closest friends wrote in her Christmas card to me: 2019 is going to be your year. Thanks, friend. I hope so!